It never rains; it pours.
Never a truer word said.
It seems like bad luck comes in spurts, usually in a row of three – in my experience.
Is this the way life works, or do we simply attract more bad luck because we slip into a negative spiral?
Is the law of attraction at play? Is it all about maintaining a positive mindset and creating an alternative perception of “luck”?
To a degree, perhaps.
But no one is immune to bad things happening in life. No one can avoid loss and upset.
But sometimes it does feel like life is conspiring against us.
Sometimes my life sucks, and I'm sure yours does sometimes, too.
Just recently I experienced a huge loss. A financial one.
An aspect of my business I had built up over 4 years was ripped away from under my feet in one cruel blow.
Worst of all, the circumstances were out of my control. There was nothing I could do about it. Gone. Just like that.
A week of anxiety ensued, mainly at night when all was quiet and the wolves came out to feast on my thoughts.
I wasn't so much worried for myself. I've always been a bit of a ducker and a diver. I have always found a way to get back on my feet and stay proficiently above the proverbial waterline.
But I have a young child: Nursery isn't cheap, nor is rent, food, and the rest that comes with being Dad.
It isn't so much the ‘now' that you think about at 2AM; it's the future…
…What will I do if [insert any given negative scenario here].
I won't get into the specifics of what happened, but it was around 40% of my income and enough to cause a lot of worry.
One saving grace was that I'd been here before. Not in this specific situation, but I knew that I had to endure a process.
First: the shock and upset.
Second: the fear and anxiety of what the future might bring
Third: the blame and anger.
Fourth: the questioning of life; why me? I'm a good person!
Fifth: the junction…
No matter who you are, you will go through these stages and experience similar thoughts and emotions, even if you've been there and done it all before.
No matter how many people say; “Don't worry, it'll be alright; things will get better, I promise”, you'll still go through the motions.
Meditation helps. Exercise helps. Loved ones and friends help. But by and large, fighting off the wolves is a process that you have to accept and endure.
And after a week or two, you'll arrive at “the junction”.
If you're going through hell; keep going.
Like the quote I started with, never a truer word has been spoken.
“The junction” is the penultimate point in the process: you've wept, been anxious, angry, bitter, and felt very sorry for yourself.
But now it's crunch time.
You have a choice: You either rise like a phoenix from the ashes, or drag yourself further down into a hole of gloom and negativity.
In that hole is where more bad luck resides (some would say this is where the law of attraction comes into play).
It is where more anxiety and more fear are ready to thrive on your weakness. It is where anger and depression can take hold.
It is a spiral that can lead to dark thoughts, addiction and other negative escapism.
Your back is against the ropes. You can either go down on the canvas or come out fighting.
When I reached that junction, I went for a run in the fields.
It was there, looking at the evening sun beaming off the long grass, that I saw this situation in a different light.
I thought about my life in the sense of physical existence. I thought about it in the context of every other sentient being.
The reality is that Mother Nature couldn't care less about finances: salary, savings, pensions, university fees, car running costs, etc.
Things live and they die. How they choose to spend the time they live is not important to her.
It doesn't matter to her if I sit down in a hole and wait to die, or get up a make a damn good go at getting myself back into the positive position I was in previously.
She's going to take my life at some point anyway.
She has been lying in wait for my day of reckoning since the moment I was born.
This is the nature of all things.
Whether I sat in that long grass or kept running, she'd still make the sun rise and set, the rains fall and the winds blow.
So it is up to me. I can rise up again or sit down and wallow in self-pity.
What's done is done. It's pointless to rue the past.
I have no choice. I must keep going. I have to let go of the past and open myself up to new opportunity.
And as a starting point I decided to focus on the many positives in my life.
I am running in the fields. I am able. I am thinking freely. I am free. I am loved. I can love too.